Public Service 101: The H1N1 Scare

Since school won’t be starting until a week from now, I still have a lot of time to rattle whatever is left of my brain after being a long professional summer bummer – and yes, professional – I got paid on two separate occasions, even got a vacation. My parents actually exiled me to an island so far that I enjoyed the silence because I had no other choice but, well… to enjoy it.

Anyway, everybody save for some friends of mine saw the blessing in the postponement of classes. As for me, it’s not that happy really. Apart from being bummed up of bumming around, the reason behind the delay of classes (at least for the college level) seems to be serious. And you don’t have to be a pig to understand why.

They never did this with SARS as far as I can remember. Heck, that thing seems to be too complicated for us to meddle with anyway. The in thing now (that’s if you have a death wish) is some sort of flu virus codenamed AH1N1. Apparently, they didn’t like how swine flu sounded. And apparently, this one is less complicated than SARS, which makes it dangerous even more. It spreads like your regular flu, acts like the regular flu, even kills like the regular flu (only that it kills faster, and more frequently).

Since the beat really loves you people of the world, we’re attempting to put up something to remind you of stuff that might help you save your life. We all hope this helps, because apart from that, we can only hope that you’re alive until the next post we have in store for you.

—  Wash your hands a lot. Most diseases spread through your favorite all-around tool. It doesn’t matter whether you’re just shaking a friend’s hand, giving your homies a high five, or checking out your special someone in the dark (go figure). A lot of things in this world (with a very few exceptions of course) can only be manipulated with the help of your hands. That goes without saying that the best way to spread germs is, you guessed it right, using your hands.  So go your wash your hands frequently. Also, viruses and bacteria find it comfortable to breed on bar soaps. You’re better off using liquid antibacterial soap instead of their bar counterparts.

—  Do clean your stuff frequently. Especially the ones that get the special attention and close contact privileges from you. Things you touch frequently in your house like door knobs, kitchen utensils, your phone, your boyfriend’s aging picture that you kiss every night, etc. The last time we checked, there aren’t viruses that are meant to particularly attack these things. But just like your hands, they are potent carriers as well.

—  Germs love floating around stagnant air. So once in a while, open your windows and let some fresh air in. In doing so, you don’t only to get to breathe some fresh air, you’re also saving yourself from a potentially deadly fart that’s about to come and get stuck in the room.

—  Eat regularly and get enough sleep. Summer’s over anyway and you probably won’t be wearing all those skimpy bikinis like you used to a month or so ago. So don’t worry about gaining some weight. The point is to get enough nutrition. Anyway, if ever you get to spend some time in the hospital (unless you’re not kept in a quarantine facility in outer space), doctors would definitely ask you to eat more than you’re dieting self can ever swallow. There’s no problem in waiting for that time to come, right? That’s if you love hospital food.

–-  If you think you’re sick, do yourself a favor by wearing a surgical mask. Yeah right, you might look silly with it. But who cares anyway? Nobody’s going to recognize you anyway. If you’re feeling super, why not try it on with the mask of Zorro. With that on you, nobody’s going to get in close proximity with you. Not even the viruses! Nah… just kidding.

–-  And finally, while all sicknesses travel through different media i.e. through earth, wind, fire, air, and sex, there’s one common way that all germs love traveling through. Mental Telepathy. Almost all diseases start from within, particularly from the mind. The moment you start feeling bad is the moment you let your guard down. Don’t be such an ass and let go of all the stressful stuff you ever encounter. Instead of spreading viruses, why not spread happiness? And then we can start worrying about world peace after that.

Have a safe, swine flu free week everyone!